Oct 5, 2023

Biden Swaps White House for Fox News, Claims, "It's Time for a Real Job!"

In a move that has stunned political analysts and late-night comedians alike, President Joe Biden announced his unexpected departure from the White House to take up a new role as the prime-time anchor on Fox News.

"I've done the Senator thing, the Vice-President gig, and even had a stint as the Commander-in-Chief," Biden mused, adjusting his new Fox News cap. "But now, I'm ready for a real challenge!"

Fox executives were reportedly hesitant at first. "We thought it was a prank call," said one top executive. "I mean, the President of the United States wanting to host 'The Biden Hour'? It was unprecedented!"

However, after seeing Biden's enthusiasm for presenting charts and his fondness for heart-to-heart monologues, they were sold. "It's like he's been preparing for this all his life," marveled the executive.

Rumors are swirling about the format of "The Biden Hour." Some say it will be a blend of policy discussions and debates, while others speculate that Biden might lean into his "Uncle Joe" persona, sharing family recipes and train stories.

"The one thing I can promise is that my show will be gaffe-tastic!" Biden winked, referencing his well-known tendency to go off-script.

Meanwhile, the Democratic Party is in a frenzy, scrambling to find a replacement. "We're considering several potential stand-ins," said one party insider. "Honestly, we might just check if Obama's up for another round. Third time's the charm, right?"

Fox's traditional viewer base has shown mixed reactions. While some are excited about the surprising twist, others are a tad skeptical. "I'll give him a shot," said one long-time Fox viewer. "But if he starts talking about bipartisan unity and the soul of the nation, I'm switching to CNN."

In related news, former President Donald Trump has been spotted outside MSNBC's studios, leading to wild speculations about a potential "Trump Morning Hour." However, sources say he's just there for the food trucks.